1.- Are you sure you need drivers? Isn't it enough to set the "BLASTER" (or equivalent) environment variable?
Which card is it?
2.- Honestly I never finished figuring that out, perhaps someone else will be able to help you. You can always try running memmaker. Or researching in Google, but it's true that saving conventional memory--when possible--isn't so easy as using devicehigh and loadhigh. You need to understand what memory areas are available and what fits there, but don't ask me.
Since the CD-ROM drivers take a lot of memory, back then I used multiple startup configurations, and loaded the CD-ROM drivers only when I needed them. You can create a startup menu with special syntax in config.sys and autoexec.bat.
3.- I remember things like that happening with several games for no particular reason, because PCs were never 100 per cent compatible, and DOS left apps to their own devices when interfacing with hardware--there are no video drivers in DOS usually, not in the OS, each game speaks to your particular video hardware directly; and if they don't happen to understand each other in the least you're screwed.
2 + 3 = why I love DOSBox
